thoreau: (robert by reid)
[personal profile] thoreau


Me and Mom - January 2007 - Florence, OR.



This post was inspired by the lovely Son/Mom shot and post over on [livejournal.com profile] txkink's journal. I don't look forward to having years where I think back to when my Mom passed away. For my own reasons, I don't find myself ever "missing" my father - but my Mom? She and I have grown closer and closer over the last few years.

We've have had our ups and downs of course: Happy Years. Angry Years. Noncommunicative Years. There were years where she tried to protect my father from my anger - Dad and I used to come at one another like angry thunderstorms. When I was young, angry and newly queer she found me very difficult to understand. (lets face it - so did my peers at the time) as I'm grown up and matured and have a better world-view? Our relationship is now the strongest it has ever been.

We've finally found that adult balance to talk and interact with each other as peers - with very little of that "you're my baby boy - you're my Mom" kind of interaction. We talk every couple of weeks - and can talk every topic from politics to dating to HIV to work to theater. I'm really glad we both let go of the anger and hurt of our past and figured out a way to be just us. Margaret and Bob, mother and son. and simply celebrate one more day in each other's lives.

She hates gifts of flowers. She admitted to me a few years ago - "flowers die so fast and you are just wasting your money." so or the last few years - on her birthday and on Mothers Day - I send her a few dollars she can go spend at the local nursery and get some plants or bulbs she can plant in her yard - - and add to her lovely hobby of a beautiful garden and flowers.

Thanks again [livejournal.com profile] txkink for the lovely reminder to really celebrate Mother's Day. :)

Date: 2008-05-11 03:50 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] d2leddy.livejournal.com
I'm really glad we both let go of the anger and hurt of our past and figured out a way to be just us. Margaret and Bob, mother and son. and simply celebrate one more day in each other's lives.

Many don't do this. What a great thing to read.

Date: 2008-05-11 04:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mrdreamjeans.livejournal.com
Thanks for sharing this tribute, Bob ...

I just spent time with my own Mom and like you, I don't look forward to celebrating her memory .. So, I make certain I celebrate her in the here and now while I have her.

HUGS!

Date: 2008-05-11 05:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] starzinked.livejournal.com
i love my mom dearly (as described in recent posts) but it always hasn't been easy

i'm happy to hear you've reached a point where you can interact as peers and not just appreciate each other but as you say , celebrate each other

Date: 2008-05-12 12:51 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kbearblog.livejournal.com
Lovely picture, I'll dare say that you are a chip off of the old block! It's good that you are on good terms with your mother, life is too short not to bury the axe.

Date: 2008-05-12 06:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] audrabaudra.livejournal.com
Too many times, we lose the plot: "Only connect." Reaching out, making and keeping that connection is the most important thing.

It's wonderful that you and your mom have each other.

Date: 2008-06-08 09:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] cuboz.livejournal.com
That's a wonderful picture of you and your Mum.... I need to post one of me and my Mum. The one I'm thinking of, if I can find it, is funny, coz I look like a giant next to her! :-)

My Dad passed away in '99, and I do think about him occasionally - even more so recently, as I know how incredibly pleased and proud he would be of me now that I'm a Train Driver, as he was such a huge train buff. :-)

*hugs*

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