smack!

[thoreau]

Yesterday I was forwarded a conversation from a fellow LJer that was like watching my personality be set up at a kid's party like a pinata - and smacked at with a stick. I friended someone - and he posted to his journal behind a friends-only lock that he didn't care for me - and was pissed and frustrated I'd friended him. and then he and his other LJ buds went on a thankfully short - but nonetheless disappointing Bob bashing spree.

The surprising thing about it all is that with the exception of two of the folks in the conversation - I don't think I've even MET these guys in person. I couldn't pick them out of a lineup. They seemed to have spectacular insight into my personality - and my reasons for being on Livejournal.

I can't be friends with everyone - nobody can.

But - it serves as an interesting lesson in how the web works:

• Be nasty enough - and someone will cut and paste your friends-only posts and forward them on as if they were public domain.
• LJ Friends aren't real friends - unless you can take the conversation off journal and really know someone. If you base your entire opinion of someone off what they "lj" - you are making a giant sized mistake. None of us posts a well-rounded view of ourselves. Nobody.
• I've never seen a forum like LJ where people will create bile and hate - and just revel in it. Some of the commentors on this post are people I've crossed paths with, and had to defriend for one reason or another - right there at the gullet to keep sparing about things about me, that they really don't know. all based on Lj-drama - which in some cases is years and years old. That's sad.

The saddest part is that it cost me to lose all respect for someone I really liked. Someone I've been "lj-friends" and I thought at least cursory real-life friends with for years - and that was sad.

Human nature makes us create these preconceived notions of one another - from whatever input we get - real life or lj or 'what I heard after soinsodatedsoandso or soinsofuckedsoandso. Unfortunately - it's part of the game. Just be careful for your karma's sake - that you don't type it out on Livejournal or some other online forum - where your shallowness can be broadcast for everyone to see clearly.